Tim Blair


New Criterion



Tuesday, September 14, 2004
SOMETHING SEISMIC IS HAPPENING OUT THERE. Even on Auntie's talk-back, Australia Talks Back, where the venerable Max-Weird McCutcheon stands at the gate yapping at dissenters, voices from beyond the commune are being heard.

On Monday night's discussion on Bali, Iraq and all that, a significant portion of the callers stepped outside the communard consensus.

That is, about a third, in my estimate, of callers thought there was something out there to be fought. Apart from US imperialism, of course; that was the concern of the other two thirds of callers.

So much defiance! Old Max-weird was quite unsettled. Several times he had to step in to restore order.

"That's what the far-right rat-pack used to say" he barked at one bold Australian back-talker. "I thought we'd left all that behind".

The caller had ventured the opinion that the Islamist terrorists were attacking us not for what we'd done, but what we are. What a ratbag.

Mind you, that, more or less, is what the Islamists say too, as they wipe the blood off their knives, but it's not accepted doctrine in the commune. They know about deeper causes; Western oppression.

In any case how can what we are be more important to the Islamists than it is to Max-Weird, who's tried being Christian, Jewish, and Buddhist and has settled for just ecumenical righteousness.

The "far-right rat-pack" got another mention on tonight's ATB, when the subject was religion. Max-Weird was doing his bit to promote Auntie's discovery of the horrible fact the George W is a Christian. In the commune, where religion and pacifism must go together - except for the Islamists of course, to be the kind of Christian who fights back places you right down there with Osama.

Max-Weird is one of those Auntie serial commentators whose continuing presence in the schedule, like that of our dear Gastropod Adams, stands as proof that the old girl is really not trying to be an honest woman.

And now Latham Labor has promised the old whore of Ultimo her reward for all that time she's spent on her ideological knees. If Latham is elected she's going to get a new red dress and a fresh coat of paint on the toe-nails. It will only cost $100 million.

Dream on, Auntie, dream on.