Tim Blair


New Criterion



Saturday, October 12, 2002

Paul Toohey of The Australian has interviewed child-bride buyer Jackie Pascoe Jamilmira, at his request, to hear his claims of entitlement to rape etc. the girl concerned. Toohey's report is available only to subscribers. It confirms the earlier report in its main points.

It also adds the information that the first wife whom Jamilmira beat to death in 1995 was a Maningrida school teacher in her mid-30s.

Next time you hear the culturally sensitive canting on about respect for other cultures, bear a few points in mind, and then drop them forcibly on top of their witless heads.

Let's assume for a nanosecond that Aboriginal culture is unchanging and unchangeable, and that Jamilmira is right in claiming that his well-being would be savagely transgressed if he were not allowed to exercise his rights under traditional law.

1. He bought his claim to the girl from her mother, against her father's opposition. A gross offence to the kind of male prerogative that Jamilmira is relying on. Both mother and rapist should expect a severe beating, at the least, for that.

2. He bought his claim by paying cash from his welfare payments to the mother. Neither welfare rights nor cash are part of traditional Aboriginal culture.

3. The relatives of his murdered first wife are also entitled to retribution, the results of which might vary from severe injuries to death for the murderer. Note that Tribal Man preferred to accept the whitefella alternative of a short prison sentence.

Ben Pascoe, the brother of the rapist, claims "if we break the law, we break the cycle" of traditional life. "The promised husband has the right to have first sex with a girl. The promised wife will always be subject to him."

Aboriginal law and custom are not unchanging, for the simple reason that Aboriginal people are not robots performing for the amusement of the ethnic romanticists, but intelligent human beings who, like the rest of us, can adapt when they wish to, or when circumstances make that the advantageous thing to do.

Toohey took the trouble to contact another community with strong links to their past, in Warburton, Western Australia, where "It's very much in the past" to force girls into such marriages. "They're quite clear they have rights".

"The world has moved on. If you have such a girl who wants to enter into such a relationship, fine. Otherwise, too bad."

Unlike the Judge, and Jamilmira's tax-payer funded lawyer, Gerard Bryant, the people of Maningrida have to live with the consequences of the doctrine of ethnic separatism.

Jackie Pascoe Jamilmira is a pathetic, vicious child rapist who is an embarrassment to his community. Unfortunately, "Pascoe's family is big and influential, whereas hers is small. By the time the rape case got to court the girl refused to speak with police or prosecution."

In the past our laws simply ignored mistreatment of Aborigines by Aborigines, even when that was made worse by introduced weapons, grog and social disruption. Now our expensive courts and lawyers have been added to the black man's burden.

Meanwhile, the raped girl is in hiding, waiting for Jamilmira and his family to make their next assault - with the full backing of Judge Gallop of the Northern Territory Court, and the lawyers of the Aboriginal legal aid service.

Poor fellow my country.

Friday, October 11, 2002
KEN BURNS is one of those rare creatures, an artist whose person is as interesting as his products.

I learnt this from Late Night Live, to which no self-respecting blogger would listen. Unless, that is, you were as struck by Burns's series on the American Civil War as I was. The kind of production that redeems television.

Almost as good as the First Contact/Joe Lahey's Neighbours/Black Harvest trilogy filmed in the PNG highlands by Bob Connally and the late Robin Anderson.

Connally and Anderson dealt with living people, for the most part, and for the time being, but Burns worked from superb still photographs and letters. He's since made many other docos, including the recent series on Jazz.

His confrontation with Adams is worth listening to just for Burns's exhibition of grand champion stroke-deflection. His high regard for both Clinton and Bush resists the Adams sneers without the least sign of discourtesy. His energetic conversation ploughed on despite the usual constant interruptions from His Superiority, who is, if you didn't know, the sperm donor for the entire modern Australian film industry.

At one point Burns manages to stay polite while barking at his host "Let me finish...". And he does.

One of the few LNLs to deserve a transcript.

IT'S DELICATE, that's all I can say about Annabelle's condition.

Don't give up.

SENTIMENT SETTLES in favour of the ex-maid of Maningrida.

The tropical Ken Parish writes to carpet old Uncle, whose glasses are often fogged over by the whiskey fumes, for failing to detect from Ken's earlier blog his firm conviction that the claim of the maid not to be raped etc. should take precedence over loathsome traditions.

I did indeed notice that Ken's comment that Many of my immediate reactions coincide with Scott [Wickstein, a blogger and alarmed by Judge Gallop's abandonment of the maid].

But when I read the next sentence: However, there are more issues involved, and they're not simple. We are reacting from the frame of reference of our own individualist western culture; Aboriginal traditional law and culture are very different I felt the maid once again slipping into the clutches of the old man, who appears to resemble Philip Adams but with a dick where Adams sports an extruding stomach.

I accept with alacrity Ken's declaration since I can see what a thoroughly decent person he is.

I just worry that Judge Gallop may not be able to read from such nuance a sense of outrage at child abuse. The man has an addled brain and probably cloth ears attached to it.

I'm also beginning to see why the yokel governments of the Northern Territory lean towards mandatory sentencing.

By the way, Auntie's one short item on the matter has already disappeared from her Website.

Anyone up there going to keep an eye out for the interests of the ex-maid of Maningrida?

Thursday, October 10, 2002

Even as I write the Friends of Annabelle Crabb are crowding into my cellar (leave corkscrews at the door please) determined that the glutinous Philip Adams shall not have his wicked way with our Annabelle.

The brochures are pouring from the copier, the lapel buttons almost done. T-shirts tomorrow.

If you've been turned away at the door here's how you can help.

Join in the email campaign! Pepper Phil with protests! Hold him accountable!

FABC knows you Blogistas are independent-minded people. Our form email let's you choose the words that truly express your views, in the most temperate of terms. Go ahead! Cut, slice and dish it out!

Your Unctuousness

I write to ask you to let Annabelle go. I know she's not perfect. She's made some mistakes. But she has her whole life before her. With time she could well become a journalist. If only you would stop stroking and stroking and stroking her when The Age makes her come and visit you. Can't you see what you are doing you vile Gastropod! Isn't it enough what you've done to that poor Margo Kingston? Have mercy!

Yours pathetically

Annabelle's Mum/Sister/Boyfriend/Landlord/Michael Gawenda

Mail! Mail! Mail!

Victory is within our grasp!

HERE'S A REAL PROBLEM. A fifteen year old girl has been raped by a middle-aged convicted wife-killer who asserts that he has bought from the girl's parents the right to go on doing it. And to beat her at his sole discretion and pimp her for profit. Do you:

A. Put him away for about 15 years with a 100 year non-parole period, to discourage the others?

B. Give him a pension and the Al Grasby Award for Preserving Foul Cultural Practices?

C. Spend another century thinking about how you can do A. and B at the same time, while whipping ourselves to a bloody lather for our Western values.?

I think Tropical Ken wants us to choose C. Judge John Gallop has already chosen B. He was "embarrassed" that the matter had come before him.

You can add this torturing choice to Uncle's self-administered tick-the-box device for divining political orientation.


You were told to. Never mind; make up for it by joining the Friends of Annabelle Crabb (FABC).

This band of brothers and sisters is dedicated to preserving the journalistic integrity of sweet Annabelle.

Together we can defeat His Lugubriousness and save a soul for decency, justice and truth.

Sign up now! You will be told the subscription later.


The occasional tragic figure gets routed to Uncle by Google. Some of them deserve it.

Take this Auntie-indicating search formulation:

images of the elderly on prime-time TV

What a dill! He should have typed:

images of elderly TV on prime blog time.


Correspondent Harper is the kind of reader Uncle does not want.

Auntie is always telling me I'm a supine beast who needs an external source of energy to get me going.

Now Harper tells me the Oracle has defined ABCwatch as:

like a normal television set, but it mimics the movements of a

Both wrong. On the other hand, the Oracle gets this just right:

philip adams is a billboard! It weighs anything you put on top of it.

...and this:

auntie is a feather duster.

AARON OAKLEY at Bizarre Science is tackling the misuse of science and statistics in politics and the media..

Aaron is the first blogger in history to put mathematics on his page.

He also provides links to some good bullshit-analysis sites, like Number Watch. If you'd checked Number Watch when the big scare about HRT and breast cancer hit the mainstream media, you or your distaff connection could have been saved the two weeks of panic while the journalists were doing the job they should have done before publishing in the first place.

Every time you hear hot news on disease, the climate and other causes of death take a Bex and a look at Bizarre Science.

Wednesday, October 09, 2002
ANNABELLE CRABB, filling Margo Kingston's airspace, is struggling in the stroke-and-be-stroked rubber jungle of Philip Adams's Late Night Live.

The oleagenous Phil is oozing all over her like a fanged amoeba. Uncle fears for her youthful integrity.

Pray for Annabelle everyone. Please!


Anyone care to tell me why Auntie is running extracts of Heinrich Harrer’s book on climbing the north face of the Eiger? It’s the 10.45 (AET) autobiographical read.

Uncle read Harrer’s Seven years in Tibet when he was a kid and enjoyed it enormously. Perhaps there’s an explanation there for Auntie’s interest.

Harrer escaped a British POW camp – sorry, Detention Centre – in India to spend the next seven years among the monks and mountains. One in the eye for the Western Alliance.

Now there’s nothing in Tibet except Chinese soldiers, and every mountainside everywhere is littered with Coke cans and corpses.

Is it the prospect of a slow frigid death at high altitudes that’s supposed to attract us?

That’s been the fate of Auntie’s commentariat.

Beats me.

THE BUNYIP surfaces from his waterhole like a fart in a bathtub, bringing us:

Can this really be plagiarism, part 2?

Answer's obvious you dopy beast.

Who would copy such boring writing. On the other hand, who would publish it?

The Bunyip is chasing a spotter's fee from Media Watch. But can they pay his price?

Tuesday, October 08, 2002
IF YOU HAVEN'T FOUND Tim Blair yet, you were probably educated by Dr John Carroll. You lucky thing!

Auntie finds him inspirational, full of perspective, a good sport, as distinguished as Robert Manne, a landmark interpreter of our "obscure" land, an eloquent undertaker for Western culture, moral philosopher, historian of World War I, analyst of the state of Grace, Prophet of re-enchantment, interpreter of psycho-analysis, economic philosopher, diviner of Roman Catholicism's future, obituarist of Humanism, advocate of sport as spirituality, and much, much more.

Tricked you!

"John Carroll" is in fact the name given to a random left-lingo word-generator by a group of very clever computer people at LaTrobe University.

"John Carroll" has now replaced the entire Faculty of Sociology. So far, the students haven't noticed.

Who said there was no substitute for Philip Adams?

MEDIA WATCH, Auntie's pale imitation of ABCwatch, found a couple of worthy targets for its selective searchlights last night.

How do you persuade the Australian electorate to love the idea of selling the rest of Telstra out of government ownership?

You find an expensive public works project with sex-appeal, buy the support of the Platinum Parrot and the Golden Tonsils, put Kerry Packer on the cheer squad (he's too rich to do it for money - isn't he?), pummel the opposition in the media (especially yours) until they retire wounded, then present it to the Government as a simple choice: take the votes we've assembled for you or take a pasting in (our) media.

Can't fail.

Just one problem. How do you find a sexy project that'll cost at least 10 billion bucks in funny money the taxpayer will never see?

Of course! Turn the Rivers Inland! Every native-born Australian knows the rest of the fairy-tale by heart.

So Platinum and Tonsils and Packer and Telstra chair Mansfield and others from the Telstra/Packer/Foxtel gang front the media (mostly theirs) conference to break the good news.

But wait, there's more!

They've put their hands in their pockets and found a spare $20 mill to hand out to hard cases in the bush. Called this spare change Farmhand. They want you to sling your money in too.

Blanket, and favourable, media coverage follows.

Roll on, Masters of the Media Universe, roll on.

But wait, there really is more!

Media Watch has used its bandwidth to download Margo Kingston playing news-magazine hostess on Fairfax WebTV. Brilliant performance. Anti-heroic. Her direct-from-the-other-side-of-the-world Herald colleague takes a 20-second break to get his coffee. Margo mumbles and picks her nose.

The future of Web video-casting for all to see.

Such as it is.

Monday, October 07, 2002

Radio National's post-prandial Sunday soporific, Pastor Terry Lane, yesterday maintained his ideological focus yesterday, despite some high-quality distraction from two excellent Australian malaria researchers.

Through all the technical talk about plant genes in mosquitoes (that's why those Anopheles are so damned evil - they're GM!), life cycles, DDT's contribution to saving millions of lives, our Tezza managed to dig out the nugget of eternal truth.

The USA is responsible for the persistence of malarial infection on the planet.

If you find that hard to believe you're not yet part of the true faith. Try listening. Take care someone is standing behind to catch you when the Spirit strikes you down.

The celestial reasoning runs something like this:

The US must take responsibility for curing all the world's medical problems from in-grown toenails to cancer.

Since malaria is not a major problem in the US they are under-investing - says Pastor Lane - in research. (Except the military, but that doesn't count).

Therefore the US is governed by a pack of heartless bastards.

Simple isn't it, once you let logic be your guide. Coupled with certifiable insanity.

This man should be blogging. At his own expense of course. Auntie is not silly enough to spend money transcribing such drivel.

Sunday, October 06, 2002

Confession time. Uncle is not an Australian.

While he was dropped onto the earth within the boundaries of the continent known to the white colonialists as "Australia", Uncle is in fact an 1/8 Irish-, 1/8 English-, 1/4 Italian-, 1/8 Welsh-, 1/8 German- and 1/8 Yorkshireman-Australian. That is approximate, not least because of some black-sheeping in the past that I do not wish to talk about. Knowing the Italians, there is probably some Moorish in there too. There is a credible rumour that Grandfather Seamus's mother was of Aboriginal descent.

So does Uncle speak Welsh, Irish, German, Italian and Yorks, and six aboriginal languages in addition to his stumbling English? No. The oppressive Imperial southern english culture of this accursed land has suppressed those essential parts of my inheritance.

I have been robbed of my cultures, my stories, my identities. I look and sound just like the rest of you!

Do I clog-dance back from the bar on Fridays? I am ashamed to say I do not.

Do I wear the shamrock, whip my lederhosen-clad thighs, pummel the squeezebox while treading out the Grappa. No, no, and no!

So much lost; so much to grieve for . To think I did not know anything of this until a chance meeting with Al Grasby.

I am now determined to get my cultural heritage back. For a start, my children must be taught in all 6 - or was it 7 - ancestral languages.

The good news is, governments are always ready to help.

Auntie's transcript trashcan reveals the following good news.

Tasmania looks set to become the first Australian state to recognise some extended Aboriginal family relationships as having the same rights as married or de-facto partnerships...Not only is the government planning to change more than 120 laws that currently discriminate against same sex couples. It will also grant the same legal rights married people have to a range of non-traditional relationships.

And so they should. It is a little known custom of my Irish ancestral bog that second cousins have a claim on the estates of their great uncles once removed in the case of hardship caused by the oppressions of the English in seasons of low poteen production. Uncle has at least six recently-deceased great uncles and they were all richer than I am. The other conditions are a push-over. Just show me the way to the tribunal!

In the mountains of Sicily (remember that 1/8th?) a chap is entitled to hop into the cot with his cousin's widowed sister provided her legs are roped firmly together. Or claim compensation. I'm still working on that one.

Spiritual wholeness awaits me, my shattered self-esteem will be mended, my cultural oppressions ended.

According to Auntie's Tasmanian ferret One of the more unusual areas of Tasmania's law reform, deals with Aboriginal and ethnic families. If the culture deems a certain relationship to be significant - new law will treat it that way.

Rodney Croome, spokesman for Tasmanian homosexuals amplifies:

We're talking about areas such as division of property, access to partners in hospital, funeral, organ donation. And the government is also considering of course the more controversial area of adoption

You will be relieved to hear that Tasmanian Attorney General, Judy Jackson, rejects any suggestion the government will open a flood-gate to people claiming significant relationship, and news laws simply recognise society is changing.

JUDY JACKSON [Attorney-General]: Well I don't think it will get out of hand in the sense that it will be up to the people themselves. If they want to declare that they have a significant personal relationship then I think in the 21st century that we should as a community recognise that

Right on Sister!

But wait. What if you claim distant relationship with me and a share of my pension, custody of my children, the right to decide whether I rot or burn, after death I hope, and where? There are precedents you say.

See you in court. Perhaps we can negotiate on the children.

I would never doubt the competence of Attorney-General Jackson, but did she do all her homework?

Tasmania's own ATSIC Commissioner hadn't heard of the proposed new law until Auntie's ferret told him. He saw the point of it quickly, but.

RODNEY DILLON: Particularly [?] when they have a cultural event – you know when they go down and they catch a feed of fish and if they're good they bring on law [??? – unclear] their sister-in-law with them.

And they're all sitting there eating their feed of fish or doing that something in that order and the police or whomever comes down to arrest them. They can arrest one because that one hasn't got a licence

You fisherpersons know what Rodney is on about here. The curmudgeons among you have been known to dob in those netting all the fish off your beach, just because they look no more Aboriginal than Michael Mansell. The colonialist police and courts have been known to cop them.

No more. "It will be up to the people themselves" as Ms Jackson put it. Uncle will have no trouble with that rule. Place your orders for bream now to avoid disappointment.

One thing worries me; the bludgers who'll be trying to muscle in on the rackets before me. Take the case of the Tasmanian Aborigines, subject to Australia's most notorious failed genocide 150 years ago.

After last year's census, the ABS estimated 17,442 indigenous people lived in Tasmania.

Schemers! They're trying to get on the gravy train before me.

When applications to join this roll [for election of Tasmania's ATSIC Councillor] closed there were 1,298 potential voters according to the Henny Penny Herald on August 26th last. "I've challenged 900 of them," says Doug Maynard of La Trobe in Tasmania's north-west. "I would have challenged all of them but my fingers ran out.

Good on you Doug! Make the buggers sit the DNA test. (This is the modern version of Australia's famous Translation Test that kept so many undesirables out until the middle of last Century).

No-one has yet been disqualified from the roll, but the onus is on applicants to prove why objections should be rejected. It is a sign of the seriousness of this decision that some may be taking the path of DNA assessment. Aboriginal community figures say up to 20 DNA samples were taken by a consultant scientist in an attempt to trace lineages to colonial-era Aborigines.

The incumbent ATSIC Councillor doesn't want to play: "I want to know where the [DNA] bank came from and how they got it . I want to know whether they got the family's permission to use that material," he protests.

Just when the contestants are getting stuck into some good, honest tribal warfare, along come this egg-headed spoil-sport: But a larger ethical concern is any reliance on DNA tests to prove Aboriginality. "There are real concerns about that," [Dr Dianna] Nicol says. "There's no single test for Aboriginality. You are not talking about a genetic trait. There's a big distinction between genetics and race."

There you have it! Colonialist, hegemonic science trying to invalidate indigenous culture. Will it never stop?

Well, Uncle doesn't know where it's all going to end. Just remember this.

Uncle is on the queue. And he's fighting mad.

By the way, some unlicensed investment advice.

Sell governments. Buy lawyers..